Letter to my 14 year old self

Hello you,

I know that this might be a little awkward to you … what with finding a letter from your significantly fatter, ten year older self … but listen. All of the mistakes that you are going to make within the next few years should not be changed. They will make you into the beautiful woman that you will become. Here is just a few pointers:

You are about to meet an amazing young man that will change your life forever. He is smart, funny, and extremely good looking. He’ll sweep you off your feet and shatter your heart … all in a matter of three months. But he is worth it. Hold on to all of the feelings that he makes you feel, all of the emotions that he causes, and all of the dreams that he helps build. You’ll lose him in a couple of years, no … don’t be afraid, don’t cry, it’s OK. He saves so many other peoples lives that were on the same path as his.

Don’t get all obsessed with who’s friends with who and which friends betray which friends. You are still going to be best friends with the ones that you are best friends with now. We still love each other dearly. The mistakes of high school are silly and irrelevant now.

Ignore your weight issues. You are not fat. Eat healthy. Get out there and exercise. Start making good decisions now … your 24 year old self will appreciate it.

In a few years you are going to get into an argument with your Mawmaw. Please kiss her good bye before you leave. Even if you are mad. Call her the next day. Please. Because that will be the last time that you will see her. It’s going to hurt so much … but maybe if you add that kiss and call it will be a little better.

There is this guy that you are going to date. He might seem great. He might seem wonderful. He is not. But even though he is not great … you are still going to waste over two years with him. Can’t change that. Don’t need to … because the things that he makes you go through, the feelings that you feel when he is drunk and angry are things that help you move on and find the man that you will be married to … so once again, it’s worth it. Without this one … you wouldn’t rush into the loving and amazing arms of the next one …

As for Aaron … dear sweet Aaron … I can’t tell you much that you won‘t figure out quickly. He is so easy to love! Just love him every day more than the last. I’m doing that now and it’s working out just fine.

I know that I mentioned earlier that I didn’t want you to change anything … but I do. Just one thing. Love mom. Call mom. Help mom. She is sick. She is very sick. She needs you to help her and be a constant in her life. This isn’t going to change anything really. You are still going to lose her. But, you will not have taken her for granted. Let me tell you right now that it is SO hard to deal with her death right now. I miss her so very much and I am so afraid that she doesn’t/didn’t know how I felt about her. So please, call her. Don’t be embarrassed of her. Bring Aaron around her … introduce her to his family. You’ll find out … they love everyone, even when they have faults.

This is a lot of information to absorb … I know that. But take it in … you are going to be fine. You are going to cry a lot … but you are going to laugh even more. And let me tell you … life is great. You are going to love it.

I love you,
Your 24 year old self